[Doorbell rings]
[Randolph:]
Would you shut up? So I can hear? I can’t hear now. Help her, Lord
[Rosie:]
Aw, you shut up, and get the door! Always tellin’ somebody to shut up, what’s wrong with you? This my house
[Randolph:]
Rosie!
[Rosie:]
Get the door!
[Pimp Lucius:]
Hey, pappy…
[Randolph:]
Don’t “Hey, pappy” me. Hmph. You just carry your ass on back in them streets
[Rosie:]
Let him in, Randolph!
[Randolph:]
Shut your ass up, Rosie! Hmph. Now just carry your ass on back to bed. You so goddamn nosy
[Rosie:]
Well, it’s my son, too!
[Randolph:]
Yeah? Well, this ain’t got nothin’ to do with you
[Rosie:]
And just how the hell you figure that?
[Pimp Lucius:]
N-n-now, I don’t wanna start nothin’ between you two
[Randolph:]
Now you just stay the hell outta this!
[Rosie:]
Don’t talk to him like that!
[Randolph:]
I can talk to him how the hell I wanna!
[Rosie:]
Yeah?
[Randolph:]
Don’t mock me, Rosie!
[Pimp Lucius:]
Mama
[Randolph:]
Now you just take your green ass on back out on them corners
[Pimp Lucius, as the door shuts:]
W-w-w…
[Rosie:]
Open the door!
[Randolph:]
Nope!
[Rosie:]
Open the door!
[Randolph:]
Nope
[Rosie:]
Randolph, open that goddamn…
[Narrator:]
Randolph thinks about it, and then he says “Shit”, and then he opens the door
[Rosie:]
Come on in, Lucius
[Pimp Lucius:]
Mama, that’s Pimp…
[Randolph:]
Mm-hmm…
[Pimp Lucius:]
Nothin’…
[Randolph:]
Now what you come ’round here for?
[Pimp Lucius:]
I-I need a favor
[Randolph:]
We ain’t got no money
[Rosie:]
Now, Randolph…
[Randolph:]
Yeah?
[Rosie:]
Now just quit actin’ funny
[Randolph:]
Bein’ broke ain’t funny
[Rosie:]
Now what’s goin’ on, honey?
[Pimp Lucius:]
Well, I need to borrow a few racks, and a place to lay my head
[Rosie:]
Honey, what’s racks?
[Randolph:]
You ain’t laying that head in none of these beds
[Rosie:]
Douglas!
[Randolph:]
Dammit, don’t call me by my nickname!
[Rosie:]
It ain’t your nickname…
[Randolph:]
Hmm?
[Rosie:]
It’s your middle name
[Randolph gasps]
[Rosie:]
Now, go on, Lucius
[Pimp Lucius:]
I-I-I-I-I-I…
[Rosie:]
Hey, now just calm down, and take your time, baby
[Narrator:]
Lucius starts to explain to his mother how he’s been getting the strangest phone calls, and then the doorbell starts the ring again, Randolph’s like, “What the hellllll is goin’ on?!” And Pimp Lucius says, “Mama, I’ll pay you back the first if you do this”
[Rosie:]
Baby, what’s the first?
[Pimp Lucius:]
The first chance I get
[Randolph:]
Don’t tell you about to go for this shit, Rosie!
[Rosie:]
Randolph!
[Randolph:]
Rosie!
[Pimp Lucius:]
Mama!
[Rosie:]
Lucius!
[Pimp Lucius:]
That’s Pimp… Lucius!
[Narrator:]
Now everybody’s screamin’, goin’ insane while the doorbell’s ringin’ off the chain
[Randolph:]
Yeah? If he’s gon’ stay, dammit, I’m gon’ go!
[Rosie:]
Aw, shut up, Randolph, and get the goddamn door!
[Randolph:]
Aw hell… Hmm?
Well, kiss me, Jesus
[Rosie:]
Well, who is it?
[Randolph:]
It’s En Vogue… with a new lead singer
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